


It's Cold, But A Least You're Still Here

by omeletteyyy33



Category: Dream SMP- fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Angst, Brotherly Bonding, Dadza, Dream Smp, Eventual Fluff, Everyone Needs A Hug, Ghostbur, Good Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Hybrid Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), I keep adding tags don't mind me, I need more healthy family dynamics, Mentioned Toby Smith | Tubbo, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Past Abuse, Piglin Hybrid Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Ram Hybrid Toby Smith | Tubbo, Sleepy Bois Inc Angst, Sleepy Bois Inc as Family, Sort of follows canon?, Suicidal Thoughts, Tommy exile arc, Tommy has a sucky thought process, Tommy needs a hug, Trauma, Winged Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), bruh idk how to tag honestly, headcanons, i don't know what that means, it just looked cool, look man he’s coping, no beta we die like wilbur, not really - Freeform, smh, technoblade is a good brother, why wasn't ghostbur a tag??
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 16:27:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,662
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28280136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/omeletteyyy33/pseuds/omeletteyyy33
Summary: Techno finds his brother hiding in his home, barely getting by. He does whatever any good person would do: take care of him.---"How are you alive?"No response.---
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s), Technoblade & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson
Comments: 41
Kudos: 713





	1. Toasty

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! First fic on ao3!  
> I wrote a quick thing when Tommy first ventured to Techno's house, and it ended up being this whole thing. Please enjoy!

This definitely wasn't the way you normally encounter your siblings.

Afterall, why would they be literally crawling out of your floorboard, holding your stuff?

"Wh- what the hell?" He blurted, processing the situation.

His younger brother, who he hasn't interacted with for at least two years, was in the worst shape possible. He was only bones, trembling and bruised. His clothes, or what could be called clothing, was just tattered rags (besides a slightly torn bandana, which was in a surprisingly good condition). He was filthy, and obviously hurt, sick and starving. His eyes screamed a different kind of manic, no longer just being a wild child; he clearly has been through some trauma.

The fear wasn't one sided, Techno was shocked, the other was fearing his life. 

"Why are you here?" Techno's voice was cold, almost as cold as the hole Tommy was crawling into.

"I'm sorry I'm sorry don't hurt me-" his brother pleaded instantly, his voice wasn't the same either- it screamed help, it screamed a desperate, broken version of himself.

"I'm not going to hurt you- answer my question. Why are you here? Are you planning to kill me?"

His voice was still strict, but the cold was gone. He wanted to assert dominance, but not make his brother anymore fearful than he was.

"No-no I'm alone. It's just me...please don't hurt me." Tommy shoved the items towards Techno, it was only food and coal.

Tommy refused to look away from Techno, keeping his eyes on every movement.

Techno sighed, and stepped towards his sibling. He grabbed the food, and sat down on the floor in front of the boy's entrance. Tommy tensed, already planning to dart when needed. He noticed, and only handed the food back to him.

"Why- why aren't you mad? Trying to hurt me?"

"I don't do that anymore- not since I retired."

"You- you're retired?"

"Yeah, since the festival. I don't do violence anymore."

"But- but you just saw me take things! Why are you giving it back? I'm trespassing!" he blurted, confused with the mercy of his warlord brother.

"You obviously need them. What happened to you? You're literally a raccoon right now."

"You don't know?"

"Know what? Did L'Manberg fall or something?" 

Tommy's eyes glassed over, his breath stopped when asked.

"....No. It's still standing."

"Oh, I haven't really been there since retirement." he lied.

"So you weren't told? I- I was exiled."

"Oh...that's unfortunate."

Tommy shot a cold glare for a second, only to return to the distant state they were in earlier.

"I-I've been alone, forgotten Techno. Only Dream was there for me. Tub- he doesn't care anymore. No one does." his grip tightened, his voice quieter than ever before.

Techno didn't know what to say, so instead he stood up and strided towards his fireplace. Tossing a few logs inside, he set it ablaze.

"...How long have you been here? I haven't had a hole there before."

"Only a few days- I ran away."

"Why's that?"

"Dr-no reason. I don't know...it's not important."

"Hmph- that's a very good explanation."

A small scoff was the only response.

He didn't want to push any further, his only concern was now taking care of his guest (or what he could call a guest). Techno fixed a small pot of soup, lightly tossing some vegetables and pork into a cauldron. After he set it above the fire, he turned to his brother.

"Do you have any armor? Warm clothes?"

"...No."

The boy trembled again, remaining in his little hole. This child was no longer the one who cheered while leading a revolution, no longer the one who Techno battled at the festival. It was wrenching for Techno to see him like this.

Sure, Techno had Carl and his voices (and occasionally Phil), but he recognized the alone feeling his teen brother had. His retirement was essentially an exile by and for himself.

He walked back to his brother, only sighing at the pitiful sight.

"Here," he stretched his hand out for him, "stand up."

Tommy hesitated, but eventually accepted the gesture. His slender, icy, now skeletal fingers grabbed his wrist, and Techno pulled him up. He was lighter than Techno thought, and that was saying something.

Now out of the hole, he could see him clearly. Tommy was covered in filth, cuts and bruises (not to mention some explosive residue), his left leg was poorly wrapped in bandages, and worst of all, he was completely barefoot. His pockets were his only source of inventory, and they seemed to be only holding the stolen coal and a metal container.

"How are you alive?"

No response.

Techno was stunned, but kept focus. The voices whispered nightmarish possibilities of his situation. He didn't want to think of what he was running from, it was only something else to worry over.

Tommy stopped trembling slightly, the warm fire seeping into his skin. His arms wrapped around his frame, trying to give some sort of self comfort. He didn't look at Techno, he only focused on the floor. The boards that hid his makeshift home were pushed to the side; all he wanted to do is crawl back inside, to cover it back, to make them both unseen again.

"Sit in the chair, by the fire." Techno pointed towards his leather chair, positioned to face the stone fireplace.

Tommy's pinpricks darted to Techno's face, still shocked that he hadn't been killed or tossed into the icy abyss surrounding the small cabin. Nonetheless, he quickly followed orders and sat in the chair.

Techno followed Tommy's movements, noticing the limp in his walk, then pulled his eyes away. 

He had to take care of the stowaway. He crossed the room, opening cabinets and chests, searching for first aid. He knew that he kept it somewhere, Phil made sure of it (which he was extremely grateful for, he didn't plan for his brother to show up in a poor condition, or to be chased with axed men all in the same week). After finding nothing in the main room, he assumed that it was upstairs.

"Stay there. I'll be back in a moment." Techno muttered before disappearing upstairs, leaving Tommy alone.

Tommy curled into the chair, refusing to let himself relax. It wasn't the time or place to anyways. Shadows danced across the room, twirling away peacefully. The only noise was a slight crackle, the wind outside, and his own breathing. His nose caught the whiff of the stew, the pork obviously marinating with the vegetables, causing a growl to emit from his stomach. No. He didn't want to eat, he felt like he didn't deserve to eat. He didn't deserve to be sitting in the chair, to be in a warm, safe cabin. He felt like he only deserved to be dead.

"Did you wrap your leg yourself?" Techno was now behind him, causing a quick yelp.

"Oh hey hey calm down, it's just me."

In his arms were bandages, ointment and other miscellaneous healthcare items.

"Y-yes."

"It needs to be rewrapped, and you have other wounds that need to be treated. Let me see your leg."

No matter how clear the gesture was, Tommy didn't trust it. He didn't want to be touched, to be stared at, to be helped.

"Tommy. If you don't take care of these you're only going to get worse."

What if he wanted to get worse? What if he wanted to waste away?

"Tommy?"

No. He was safe, he was literally being handed help by family. He was safe and warm. He could relax.

Tommy uncurled and slowly lowered his leg, so it was dangling off of the chair.

Techno was slightly annoyed at the delay, but he couldn't get upset over the hesitation. He grabbed the leg, lifting it to try to get a better look at it. Gunpowder dusted the poorly wrapped wound, specks of dried blood decorated it as well. It was easy to get it to undo itself, but the gash would be hard to treat.

"How long has this been here?"

"A week at most."

At least it was more recent, the chance of it being infected was lower than before. Techno went to work.

Tommy was tense at any touch for the majority of it, but stayed in place. He didn't want to cause more trouble than he already had. It seemed like an unbearable amount of time dragged by, but soon Techno finished up with treating all of Tommy's visible wounds.

"There," he huffed, "All done. Do you have any other wounds on you?"

"No."

"Alright then, let's eat."

Techno stood up, and went off to fetch some bowls. Tommy tested moving, the new and correctly made wraps made it slightly harder to move, but he could manage. His brother returned, fixing the duo their meals.

A bowl was handed to Tommy, along with a slice of bread. The spices swirled inside the stew and in a delicious aroma. He held it, but didn't touch it.

"You have to eat something."

"I'm not hungry." he lied, and his stomach growled in response.

"Your body says otherwise. Eat." Techno said this sternly, breaking his eyes away from the soup and looking directly at Tommy.

Tommy raised the bread to his mouth, but lowered it.

"....Why are you helping me?"

"..."

"W-why?"

"You need it."

"No, I can take care of myself."

Techno scoffed, and set down his bowl.

"If you call this taking care of yourself-" he gestured at Tommy's entire being, "-you obviously can't. C'mon Tommy, just accept the food."

Techno tried to make a slight laugh, but it died in his throat when he saw Tommy silently crying.

"Tommy?"

"T-this isn't right, you're supposed to kill me. Yo-you're supposed to throw me out, not feed an-and take care of me!" He sobbed, completely breaking.

"Tom-"

"W-why? I'm not worth it. I-I'm not worth spending food on, not worth sp-pending resou-"

"Tomathy! Stop it right now!" Techno ordered, bubbling anger causing his voice to ring through the entire cabin.

"You're not a burden Tommy, I'm helping you because that's the right thing to do. I don't know what the hell happened to you, but it was obviously horrible and unforgivable. You need to cut this out, you're worth so much more than you are making yourself think."

Techno's voice got quiet, Tommy's eyes were blown out of his skull, his tears stopped.

Tommy was wordless, so many months and months of being with Dream in exile told him everything other than Techno's loud, passionate speech. He felt warm, not alone for the slightest moment. He felt a forgotten way, he felt safe and loved.

He went to protest, but stopped himself. No, he won't let himself deny it. He refused to let Dream's voice ring through his head, to say he was worthless. Alone. A person who didn't deserve food, a single possession. Dream lied to him, he lied and lied and lied over and over again.

Tommy deserved to be able to be warm and safe. He deserved to be healthy, to be full of food. He bit into the bread violently, refusing to stop to even take a breath. He demanded that he was worthy of something. He wept, but it didn't hurt. 

Techno once again saw the boy who he knew, the one he remembered. It wasn't going to last, but the fact that Techno could see his brother's raw determination and fiery soul for a moment meant something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bunch of crappier stuff will happen in this, I just think the super fast bounce back for Tommy was a little off, no?  
> I did the math one time after Tommy kept stressing being in exile for a week. Turns out that a week of normal time is roughly two years in Minecraft time, so I'm rolling with the in game passing of time in this fic.   
> Words: 1970  
> Comment if you liked it, positive critique is welcome :)


	2. Somethings Are Better Unanswered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Techno has a chat and Tommy has an episode.

Tommy quickly ran through multiple servings of stew, eating like there was no tomorrow. It was a reflex to him at this point; if he wasn't being starved, he would eat as much food as he could get hold of.

"Woah Tommy, slow down. That's like, your 8th bowl." Techno chuckled, happy that his bony brother was eating in what looked like forever.

Tommy gasped, finishing the broth that was pooled at the bottom of his bowl.

Techno took his bowl from him, and quickly disposed of them in the sink. The cabin wasn't as quiet as before, the fire now roared and the wind picked up outside. A soft whinny came from what would be assumed to be Carl's stable, and the quiet drips of soapy water from the sink.

"Techno?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you." 

Tommy's voice and breathing became soft, now content and relaxed. He curled into the side of the leather chair, letting warmth and his overwhelming urge to sleep to take over. The boy quickly dozed off, and the cabin dissolved around him.

Techno returned to the fireplace, only finding Tommy snoring softly in the chair. A soft smile crept onto his face, he was happy that his brother was getting well needed rest. Sure, the chair wasn't the best place to sleep in, but it was better than nothing. Techno was certain he wasn't going anywhere, so he wandered upstairs.

Now another task was at hand: finding extra clothing that was warm, and hopefully small enough, to give to the sleeping boy below him. He could easily find coats and sweaters (it didn't matter if those were baggy), but the only pair of pants he could offer were definitely going to be too big. He could give him a belt, and he'll just have to roll up the legs in the meantime. A pair of wool socks were also thrown in the ever growing pile of clothes.

Techno passed by his desk while searching, his eyes falling onto a messy stack of letters. He paused, stopping to look at the slightly crinkled paper. The letters were between him and Phil, the only person he kept in contact with after disappearing into the arctic tundra. 

The two would almost send letters to each other daily, but lately Phil stopped writing. The last note was filled with a slight suspicion of something darker happening behind the scenes of the government of L'Manberg, but nothing out of the ordinary. Techno didn't question it, it was easier not to anyway.

He shook off the random train of thought, and backed away from the desk. Right now he was helping Tommy, he didn't need to focus on anything else.

Techno was surprised to find a pair of worn boots, and gladly added it to the collection of clothes to gift. He snagged a blanket as well, his brother would probably need it. Bundling everything into his arms, he made way back downstairs.

Tommy sprawled out awkwardly in the chair, his limbs draped over the arms and dangled off of the sides, and his face was no longer peaceful. It was twisted into a frown, soft mumbles now came from him.

"N-no.......please stop...."

"I'll be good....."

".....sorry...."

Techno scowled, registering that he was revisiting a memory.

_'What happened to him? Why is he like that?'_

"That's none of your business."

_'Look at him Techno, he was hurt. He is hurt. It's obvious what happened. Dream happened, Dream happened! What did Dream do? He hurt your brother, he hurt him! He must suffer Techno! He must bleed! Blood! Blood! Dream's blood!'_

"...No more blood. We've been over this."

Tommy muttered incomprehensible nothings, tears streaming down his face.

 _'What do you think happened? What did Dream do? What? Did he break him? Make him almost die? Starve him? Beat him? Did he strip him from everything? Cut him off completely? Yes! He did! He did! HE CAUSED PAIN! Death to the green man! Blood! Blood! BLOOD! BLOOD!'_ the voices roared, demanding justice, demanding violence.

"Enough, shut up." bitter words on a sharp tongue.

"No!! Please Stop!!" Tommy screamed himself awake, launching himself on the floor, hacking coughs like he was drowning.

Techno threw everything to the side, running to the fallen boy. Tommy sobbed, his body refusing to take in oxygen. Techno wrapped his arms tightly against his brother, trying to calm him down, to ground him in this plane, to this world, to the room of the cabin.

"Dr-dr-eam!! I-I-I'm so-sorr-rry!!" He gasped, literally clawing his way out of Techno's arms.

He scrambled out and crawled desperately to the corner of the room. Ragged breathing and sobs, Tommy practically threw all of his belongings away from himself.

"I-I'll be g-go-good!" He curled into a tight ball, to protect himself.

"Tommy! Please stop! I-it's only me! He's not here!" Techno yelped, once again wrapping the boy.

Techno rocked Tommy back and forth, his hand cradling the boy's messy head of hair, trying so hard to snap him out of it. He just kept sobbing, it hurt so much. Techno didn't know what to do, it only made him feel worse.

The two remained in the corner for almost an hour before Tommy started breathing correctly again. His sobbing slowed due to him going back in and out of sleep, his energy completely gone from this episode. Finally Tommy went limp in Techno's arms, who was trembling, trying to keep himself in composure. Techno slowed the rocking, and brushed the boy's hair out of his face.

Techno was hurt, but Tommy was broken. The wind rattled the glass windows and the roof groaned quietly, it seemed a blizzard formed outside. It meant that Techno had to make sure the fire was extra large tonight, to keep them both warm.

He slowly got up off of the ground, taking Tommy with him. Techno pressed him to his chest, and carried him up to his room. He laid the boy into the soft bed, making sure he wasn't positioned awkwardly. A warm blanket was draped over his frame, then a comforter as well. Once satisfied with tucking him in, Techno sighed and sat down at his desk.

He quickly went to writing.

_Phil,_

Techno figured that Dream is probably looking for Tommy, especially if he ran away like he told him. He had to keep the contents of his letter short and not specific.

_The voices crave blood again, and I think they might get it this time._

He stopped his pen, he didn't know what to say. This letter wouldn't leave his desk.

Techno twisted himself to look at his brother again. Shallow breaths, a face too worn for a young person. A child nonetheless. He pressed his hands against his chin mindlessly, watching Tommy's chest rise and fall, snow whip by the window, and soft light flicker.

 _'...What actually happened in the last 2 years?'_ a single quiet whisper.

"I...I don't know."

_'This isn't good.'_

"I know."

More silence, the air getting colder, the cabin getting darker. He should really rebuild the fire.

_'...How long do you think he would've had if we didn't find him?'_

Techno didn't want to answer, he didn't want the mental image of his brother wasted away. He already had one dead brother, and that was already one too many.

_'What was he living in? A hole?'_

"Apparently."

_'What did he have before he ran off?'_

Probably nothing, but he hoped he had at least somewhere dry to sleep at night.

_'Does he actually have anything to call his?'_

Something Techno could try to answer, even if it left thousands of unanswered ones, he could try to answer the single, quiet, question asked.

"Let's find out."

Techno wandered downstairs again, drifting to the stone face of the fireplace. The fire was only small licks now, the frost seeping through the windows. He didn't need another weak flame to worry about. Several logs were thrown onto the flickers. Techno didn't move until the fire returned to the burning chaos that was needed.

_'He threw things at you earlier, yes?'_

"Watching things like that in third person is easier right?"

_'No, not really.'_

He turned to face the rest of the cabin, looking at the floor where they both sat not even a few hours before.

_'Coal, apples, everything that we- what's that next to the bookshelf?'_

A quiet huff was his response, walking towards the wooden shelf. A metal container glistened in the fire's light, laying face down against the floor. He knelt down and raised it off of the wooden planks, his fingers trailed the round side. A small clasp kept a lid on it, and Techno softly unhooked it.

A compass with _Your Tubbo_ engraved on the inside.

It was closed just as quick and gentle as it was opened.

_'This was his only thing on him? His only item?'_

"Stop, he...he has to have something. Anything."

Techno turned to the floorboards laying dismissively to the side. He should just cover it up. He should just pretend it wasn't there.

Heavy footsteps led him in front of the hole. The insides were pitch black, even with the fire being twice the size than before. There was no visible ladder or steps either, it really was just a hole. A hole that was apparently his brother's home for days. Why didn't he notice sooner?

A lighter snapped itself alive, he wasn't sure if there was enough room for him and a lantern, let alone him and a torch. He held it out above the hole, only seeing less than two feet of the thing below him. It was going to be a tight fit, but one he could manage. Several awkward moments of shimmying later, Techno managed to slip into the dark abyss.

It was so much colder than the room above him, barely above freezing.

With the little light he had, he could only see the low ceiling and the corner of the room. Techno placed his hand against the wall, noting the sharp uneven surface. 

Voices whispered nothings.

A few steps forward, small shapes on the floor came into view. 

The murmuring got louder, but was still incoherent.

He left the wall, stopping in front of the items. A small record player that smelled of gunpowder, a poorly made wooden sword, and a crumbled pile of half burnt photos.

Screaming. What were they saying? It hurt Techno's head.

Nothing else was there, the cold bit his limbs. Did he really sleep here?

Roaring. Bits and pieces of syllables.

Techno grabbed the items off of the floor. Did he really live here?

_'GET OUT! GET OUT! SOMEONE'S HERE! GET OUT!'_

Damn. Techno rushed over to the entrance, pushing himself off of the rocky wall and up through the hole.

"Hello? Anyone home?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyo! I didn't think I'd update so soon, but motivation is in my bloodstream so here's the next chapter!  
> I wanted to write Techno chatting with the voices, and honestly, I think I'm going to write the voices more like spirits than actual voices in his head, like he's being haunted I suppose...  
> Also another side note, all 3 brothers are adopted, Techno being the oldest (23-29), Wilbur is the middle child (23-27), and of course Tommy being the youngest (16-17). Phil is 43-49? Not sure on the exact ages, but yeah that's about the ages I want them in this fic.  
> Words:1820  
> Comment if you liked it, any positive critique is welcome :)


	3. Raccoons and Goop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More dialog, more bad feelings.  
> Also slime. Lots of slime.

"Hello? Anyone home?"

Techno pulled himself out of the hole, the lighter snapping shut as it fell out of grasp.

"Just a min-" Techno tried to stall the person, but stopped when he saw the transparent guest already inside.

"Oh. Hey Wilbur."

The slightly faded and misty image of Wilbur drifted around the cabin, seemingly absent minded.

"Oh Techno! Hi!"

A kind smile was given, but not received.

"You're not good at timing, are you?"

A valid question, the last time his brother was here Tubbo and his cabinet almost killed Carl and himself. It was simply ignored or unheard by Wilbur.

"Why's your house messy? And why are you coming out of a hole?"

"Uh...I have a pest issue. Raccoons." Techno is a horrible liar.

The ghost hummed in response, already uninterested.

"Sure is a crazy one, eh? A normal raccoon wouldn't cause such a horrible mess."

Techno didn't pay attention, he focused on fixing the floorboard and refolding the fallen clothes.

"Heh? Oh yeah... definitely a strange animal."

Small snickers came from the voices, causing Techno to raise his eyebrows.

"Why are you here again?"

"Well I was getting something for Friend and then I was wandering over to Tommy's vacation home and...and...I got...lost? I'm not sure, but then it was snowing and so cold...I don't like the cold...but now I'm here!" A cheerful smile ended his rambling.

Positivity could easily be forced or faked by Wilbur, and Techno knew it. Sure, he was no longer the same Wilbur Techno grew up with, but was still him. Another hollow shell of a sibling Techno once remembered, one he knew.

_'He's lying, something's up. Why's he here? Why's he here?'_

Techno thought of a small, quiet idea.

"So...how's Tommy doing? Don't you visit him often?"

A quick flash of panic made itself shown on Wilbur's features, but was covered up with a smile again.

"Tommy wasn't feeling too good last time I saw him, he had a lot of blue to throw away...But he wanted to throw a party! I was helping him give out invitations! He hasn't been back from vacation in a very long time...but he wanted to celebrate with everyone! Then Dream wanted to help give out invitations and I gave them to him and..." he stopped, seemingly lost in thought.

Techno tensed at the slight mention of Dream, his brain trying to piece everything together. 

"...What were we talking about? Techno?"

"Dream...has he been with Tommy this entire time?"

"Um...I'm not sure...he's been with Tommy every time I've been there..." Wilbur looked at Techno, who was glaring slightly at the burning logs in the fireplace.

Why the hell would the person who gave him a lifesaving totem be the same one torturing his sibling? What was Dream planning, what was he doing?

"You seem tense," a small clear puddle of slime formed in his fingers, and he gestured his limb toward the other. "Calm yourself, have some blue."

Techno looked down at his brother's palm, an unimpressed look on his face.

"Wilbur, that's not blue."

"But it will be!"

Wilbur practically threw it into Techno's hands, the slime instantly turning into a deep blue.

"Disgusting!" Techno shook it off, flinging it into the fireplace.

"Woah- I didn't even have to tell you that you throw it away!" the impressed tone was met with a confused look, but once again ignored by the phantom.

"Ooh look! It's the family photo!"

Wilbur lifted a precious golden frame off of the fireplace, and mindlessly floated towards the leather chair.

"There's you, dad, Tommy and Wilbur! We were so young back then. Remember fencing as kids Techno?"

Of course he did. They would spend hours together, refusing to come home until it was dark out. It would scare Phil constantly, the two would often be covered in scratches and marks when they returned. The adrenaline rush, the bright smiles and cheerful laughter after one of them emerged victorious, most often Techno. It was a cherished memory.

"Yeah, I do." he softened at the nostalgic feeling, but then returned to a stern face.

"Why did you refer to yourself in third person?"

"...Because it's not me? That's alive Wilbur, not me. I'm ghost Wilbur, remember?"

Wilbur nervously rubbed his fingers against the frame, disappointed that the only thing he could feel is the temperature of the metal.

"...I know, it's just...strange."

Another reminder that his family is different, that the events that have occurred changed them all.

Techno tried to change the topic.

"How's your sheep doing?"

"Oh Friend?" Wilbur seemed to perk up at the question.

"He's with dad, keeping him company."

"That's good?"

"Yeah, Friend gets along well with everyone."

"...How's Phil doing?"

"Oh dad got arrested!"

Techno let out a surprised noise, "He got arrested?!"

Wilbur was unphased by the sudden panic.

"Yeah? He's under house arrest, Tubbo and the others made him a few days ago."

It would explain the sudden lack of letters from Phil, and everyone showing up to his home earlier that day.

Techno put down everything he was holding, and pinched his nose. Phil's suspicions made more sense now, but let more questions appear than he wanted. The sudden clarity would probably cause more issues.

"...Why do you have that?"

"Have what?" Techno now focused on his brother, who was giving him the same confused look he had.

Wilbur drifted over to the items on the table, his faded grey fingers now laying on the metal compass.

"...Why do you have Tommy's compass?"

The quiet, nervous question was almost unheard by Techno, who was currently being screamed at internally.

_'Shit. No no no no no. Lie Techno. Lie lie lie. Don't tell, don't tell, don't tell. Lie lie lie.'_

Techno didn't want to, but he already did. He lied that it was a raccoon, he lied that he didn't know how Tommy was doing. Lying would only make things worse, wouldn't it?

"Wilbur, I need you to promise me something."

Techno's red eyes studied his brother's grey ones, they were filled with confusion, fear and compassion. 

"I need you to promise that no matter what, you don't tell anyone about this."

Techno tried laying his hand on his brother's shoulder, but it phased through like a cloud of smoke. Disappointed, but still stressing the importance of the situation, Techno climbed halfway up a ladder that led them upstairs. His hand gestured to the ghost to follow, who nervously did so.

"Don't be loud, I don't want him to wake up again." he whispered, titling his head towards the bed.

Tommy laid on his side, curled onto himself. Soft breathing was heard, along with wind against the windows.

"He's... he's here?"

"I found him earlier this evening."

"Why did he leave his vacation?"

"Are you serious? Look at him Wilbur, that's a crappy so-called vacation."

Wilbur's hand covered his mouth lightly, obviously confused and shocked.

"Did you really think he was on vacation? You even visited him! And I thought I was clueless. Wilbur... what actually happened to him?"

"I...I..." he muttered through his own hand, which was now pressed harshly against his jaw.

"Wilbur- this is serious. He's not doing good, physically nor mentally. He's been messed with, completely underneath our noses."

"I don't...I didn't..."

"Are you in denial Wilbur? Did you see what was happening? Or did you not even know?" Techno's voice got sharper, his words pushing harder, trying to get any information he could out of his brother.

"I don't...I don't know..."

Blue slime glomped into the floor, Wilbur's entire being was now covered in it.

"Sorry...I'm sorry..."

Techno was starting to hate those words, they only made it worse.

Wilbur flickered in and out of visibility, the blue slime becoming a deeper color.

"...You really didn't know..."

There was no response besides a small gaze in his direction.

"...Don't apologize, I went too far. It's ok Wilbur, let's try to clean up your blue."

A simple nod and small smile was given, and this time received.

After what seemed like hours, almost all the goop was disposed of. Techno wasn't sure if the blue would stain, but hoped that it'll wash out of the wood eventually. Wilbur tried to sit on the wooden stool at Techno's desk, but kept slowly falling through it.

"Are you ever able to sit down?" the question was asked through a quiet chuckle.

"Sometimes, I'm just too tired right now."

 _'Tiredbur. Tiredbur.'_ A joke nickname was repeatedly in a sing-song voice, causing Techno to smile.

Wilbur was now floating over the bed, like he was laying on it with their younger brother. His fingers lightly combed through the younger's boy blonde mess, gentle enough not to wake him.

The smile fell from his face, and for the second time today, Wilbur let his feelings show.

"Do you think he'll be ok?"

"I don't know."

Techno's answer left a sour taste in his mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some slight fluff, but mostly sad Ghostbur.  
> I wanted to throw in some concepts for my bois, but ended up scrapping one of them.  
> Ghostbur's famous blue dye? More like him throwing ecto-ghosty-plasm-goop at people.  
> I like the idea of him being too transparent or weak to actually be able to sit/react to things, and since it's canon that he can remember the smell of bread, I wanted all of his senses (smell, taste etc.) to be gone except feeling temperatures (hence why he hates the cold).  
> The one I ended up throwing out was him being able to hear the voice's dialog. It would've been like him hearing other ghosts, but not being able to communicate back without the help of Techno. Blehhh,, concepts are weird :p  
> [also side note, I'm dumb and don't understand how to put things in italics on this site, so everything voices say are technically in italics, but luckily I also mark them in the small ( ' ) instead of the ( " ) used for dialog]  
> Words: 1502  
> Comment if you liked, positive critique is welcome :)


	4. Safety (Or What Could Be Called Safety)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bad vibes, but some cool parts with sweaters and bees.  
> TW// contains slight references of suicide attempts, take care loves.

Midday sun shone through the windows, the golden rays cloaking Tommy's disheveled bedding. His eyes slowly opened, heavy eyelids begging not to. Regardless, the boy jolted awake, registering that he was no longer in his tent, his man-made cavern, nor the leather chair. Panic once again filled him, his pinpricks scanning the surroundings.

Small windows, bookshelves, wardrobe, messy desk, a chair with clothes and a plate of food. This must be Techno's room, but he had no clue on how he got there. His hands gripped the blankets, noting the softness, the warmth. Something to feel safe in, but he wasn't sure if he could experience that forever.

"...H-hello?" he called out, his voice raspy from sleep.

How long was he out?

He received no response, the cabin remained silent. Specks of dust drifted through the sunbeams, a soft hum from a busy beehive could be heard from outside.

The blonde stretched, his arms sore from the lack of use. Hopping out of bed, he quickly recognized that he had a horrible headache, and felt like he was burning alive. Tommy groaned, almost losing balance, but refused to let himself go back to sleep. He didn't think he needed it.

He wandered over to the chair, where a plate of eggs, bread and hash browns gently sat on top of what looked like folded clothes. It was already cold, but Tommy wasn't going to eat it anyways. He lifted it out of his way, a folded piece of paper revealing itself underneath the plate. Tommy placed the dish on top of the desk, and picked up the cream colored note.

_Make sure you eat something, here's some stuff to keep you warm. I'll be out for a bit, stay inside while I'm gone. Wilbur says hi._

_-Techno_

Tommy seemed to deflate, a nervous feeling building in his stomach. Wilbur was here? Why is he being so nice? Why?

He tossed the paper next to the plate of untouched food, then gazed upon the neat stack of fabric.

White and light blue striped socks, maroon, olive, pink and navy blue sweaters, worn leather boots, thick tan pants, various winter jackets, and a belt. It was all too big to fit him correctly, but he didn't mind. He didn't want to think about the last time he changed the clothes on his back, it was far too long for anyone to be comfortable.

He did have a jacket before he ran off too- it was Wilbur's old one, torn and tattered, but that didn't matter anymore. It was gone, along with everything else he owned. Destroyed, only ashes at most.

Tommy shook his head, trying to push his thoughts out of it. He ran away, he wasn't ever going to go back.

Right?

He rubbed the fabric of the sweaters, contemplating if he should even wear them. They were made of wool, all varying in itchiness and softness. He decided that he liked the maroon one best, and quickly changed.

He caught view of a mirror, something he hasn't seen in forever. An unfamiliar face looked back at him, a body too thin, too dirty, too tired. Did he always look like that? He thought he would've looked more toned, stronger from all of the hardships he went through, but the boy in the mirror said otherwise. No wonder Techno said that he couldn't take care of himself. Maybe that's why no one visited him, why Dream watched him daily. He looked like one hit away from death. Was Dream really there to take care of him? Did he actually care? 

Did he really run away from the last friend he had left?

"No. Dream wasn't my friend, he doesn't care." Tommy only whispered to himself, he wanted to deny any thought that said otherwise.

He trailed his hand down his chest, he could feel his ribs move with every breath. He felt too thin, too weak in the reflection. 

He didn't want to look at himself anymore, it only made him feel worse. 

The only thing from his older outfit that he kept was the green bandana. It was a reminder, a promise that he wanted to hold onto. A promise to stay by each other's side, no matter the outcome, no matter the choices made along the way. A promise that was broken, a reminder that the hope he kept holding onto was stripped away from him, just like everything else.

Then another thing hit him: he no longer had the items in his old shorts, his pockets were empty when he changed.

His compass. Did he lose it? Did Techno take it from him? Was this just another Dream situation? A repeat of last time, a repeat of the same thing he just escaped?

His breathing quickened in pace, his eyes quickly looking for an exit. Window, window, ladder. He bolted, his head spinning, pounding just as hard as his own heartbeat. Tommy practically fell down the ladder, landing on his knees. Pain shot through his legs, but it didn't matter. He wanted to escape, he wanted the only things that he had left.

Tommy ran to the spot where he was hiding, to the place he called home yesterday. But to his fear, the floorboards were put in place. His thin fingers clawed at them, trying desperately to pull them up. Wooden splinters stabbed into his hands, but he kept tearing as hard as he could. They didn't budge, they had to be nailed down.

"Shit! No no nonono-"

Just then, a small gleam was seen, just barely in the corner of his eye. The table. He stumbled over as fast as he could, his body slowly shutting down, too exhausted to stand any longer.

Instant relief washed over him when he saw his items laying on the table. They were here, they were safe. He grasped the compass, knuckles turning white from the sheer grip he kept on it.

On the table was also the items he had in the home he made, minus the wooden sword. But he didn't need it, he had his compass, his photos, and his record player. It was all here, waiting for him. He shoved his photos in a side pocket of his pants, and clipped the compass on a belt loop. He didn't really touch the player though, it only caused his headache to get worse.

He didn't want to think anymore about Dream today, he already did that too much.

A long exhale escaped his lips, he didn't realize that he was holding his breath. His fingertips and knees tingled and throbbed, the adrenaline wearing off made the damage take its toll. It wasn't the worst pain he experienced, he decided to ignore it.

He walked over to the window, gazing into the icy wilderness. The cabin itself was in an open section surrounded by mountains and spruce forests, hiding it from the outside world.  
He was hidden from everyone, including Dream. He was safe, wasn't he?

Sure, ending up in his brother's home was a complete accident, but a welcomed one. He barely made it here, and he didn't care who's home it was at first. He was glad to be alive, away from the stupid beach, away from Dream. All he wanted was to be his own person, to have a shelter, to have something to be his. Freedom.

That was something he was always fighting for, wasn't it?

He sat down on the windowsill, curling onto himself, watching the way everything outside peacefully moved. Small specks of clouds drifted through the winter sky, bees passed the window, pollen falling off of it's fuzz as it made its way home.

_"Tommy look! Isn't it amazing?"_

_A small handcrafted beehive was neatly decorated, bees swarmed softly around the boys._

_"We're gonna have so much honey big man!"_

_Smiles, bright sun. Laughter filled the air, tall blades of grass waved and crinkled in the breeze._

_Flowers filled his arms, purples, pinks and yellow filled his eyes. Pollen dusted his face and clothes, a sneezing fit ensued._

_He couldn't feel happier._

Tommy opened his eyes to him alone, face pressed against the freezing glass. His eyes burned like he was crying.

A small clatter came from the kitchen, making Tommy become hyper aware of his location.

"...Techno?"

"Oh, you're awake." Techno's voice replied from the kitchen, and once again Tommy relaxed.

He shifted, removing his cheek from the cold windowpane, turning so his legs dangled off of the sill.

"When did you get back?"

"An hour ago, you were passed out by the window."

"Oh. Sorry."

Techno entered the main room holding a plate of meat and carrots, offering it to the teen.

"You didn't touch your food this morning."

"...So?"

"Eat. Your body needs the nutrients- what's that?"

Techno's eyes noticed the faded red speckles and splotches on Tommy's knees, knowing for a fact that they weren't on those pants before.

"N-nothing, I'm fine."

Tommy tried snatching the plate from Techno's hands, trying to change the topic, trying to direct the situation away from the way it was going.

"Tommy did you get hurt? When did that happen?"

Techno moved the plate out of the boy's reach, kneeling to get a closer look. It was definitely blood.

"It's nothing, I said I'm fine!"

"What did you do when I was gone?" Techno's voice went dark, making Tommy tense.

"I-I didn't do anything, I just changed and came down here! Piss off Techno!"

Techno only frowned, cold red eyes meeting with the dagger like blue ones.

"Fine, fine. Just eat, ok?"

The plate was brought back to the boy, it sat next to him on the windowsill. A fork sat on the rim of the porcelain dish. Tommy refused to look at his brother.

"Why was my stuff on the table?"

"...You threw it at me? Plus I had to fix my floor."

"No I didn't! I would never throw my com-"

"-Yes you did. Last night you threw it at me. You don't remember?"

Tommy snapped his head to face Techno, who was intensely staring back at the boy with a puzzled look.

"Tommy, something happened to you, and Dream had something to do with it."

He choked on his spit, his face drained of color.

"I know you're not an open person, and it obviously affected you, but please tell me- what happened to you?"

Tommy started trembling, his head pounding.

He didn't want to say the words. He didn't want to say that he was beaten and starved and abandoned. He didn't want to say that he almost dived into lava, off of a tower. He didn't want to say that the one person he hated the most was the only one there for him, and even then still tortured him. He didn't want to say the only place he had was blown to pieces, along with his way home. He didn't want to say that his best friend kicked him out of the place he fought for, the place he loved. He didn't want to say that he almost drowned himself, that he almost let himself freeze in the snow. He didn't want to say that he had nothing, that he was nothing.

Luckily for him, he blacked out and dropped to the floor.

Tommy regained consciousness when he felt freezing water hit his face.

"Tommy!"

"Huh? W-what happened?" a sharp pain shot through the side of his head, causing him to groan and wince.

"You fainted- are you ok? What do you remember last?"

"You gave me food...an-and asked me something."

A sigh of relief was released from Techno, who was holding an empty bucket.

"You scared me, it was like you died in front of me."

Wasn't the first time he did, but he was grateful that it wasn't the case right now.

"W-why would that scare the 'blood god'?" a nervous and weak laugh.

It wasn't answered.

Techno wrapped Tommy's new head, hand and knee injuries while the teen ate, and the duo started cleaning soon after. The water on the floor was used to mop, and Techno placed the record player upstairs.

It sat out of view on the bookshelf, in an empty spot surrounded by his favorite books. He sat on his stool, moving the plate of untouched food out of his way.

_Phil,_

_I'll rescue you soon._

The letter was folded nicely into an envelope, and snapped itself out of sight.

Surely it'll get received any moment, the ways of the world could be taken for granted by the majority of people.

He returned back to Tommy, who was currently sitting on the floor by the window, staring at his pictures.

"What are they of?"

"A christmas tree, Wilbur and I on a beach...me and Tubbo..."

The pictures were all he had left of the homes he once claimed his, and even they were half burned.

He shoved them into his pocket again, and stared out of the window.

The afternoon sky was starting to fade into a yellow, flakes of snow fell softly out of the clouds. The lights of lanterns outside started flickering into view in the now orange scenery.

And so was a figure coming out of the trees.

The glowing armor and ceramic mask was unmistakable to Tommy.

Dream was standing outside of Techno's cabin, and was trekking his way to the door.

"Techno? We-we have a problem."

"Yeah?"

"L-look." it came out in a choked whisper.

Techno quickly stood by his brother when he heard the tone in his voice, and watched through the frosted glass as the green man made his way through the snow.

"How did he find my cabin?"

"D-Dream...is he here for me?"

"Not sure."

"I-I can't go back, I can't do that again Techno- T-Te-Techno please you have to help me."

"Tommy- open the chest in the back, the one on the top, on the right. Grab a potion of invisibility. Now." Techno ordered quietly, refusing to look away from the approaching threat.

Tommy ran to the back, doing everything instructed with shaky hands. He was one mistake away from returning to Dream's hands. He brought the bottle of luminescent blue to Techno, hiding out of the view of the window.

"Drink it, hide somewhere he can't see."

The potion was chugged instantly, the spiced taste of nether wart burned his throat. His eyes darted around the cabin until they came to a barrel in the corner. He darted to it, jumping into the wooden cylinder. He essentially threw the lid on top of it.

A firm knock rang through the cabin, Tommy held his breath.

Techno opened the door halfway, resisting the urge to sock the man in the face.

"Hey Techno."

"Oh Dream, what brings you out here?"

"Nothing much, mind if I come in?"

The fake friendliness was disgusting.

"Of course, come on in." A fake smile, the now open doorway inviting the monster in.

Dream stalked in, immediately looking around the home. Not knowing what he was looking at made Techno even more tense, he wanted to break the mask and the face that wore it. But sadly, he had to act like he didn't know why the man was here.

_'Kill him now. Now. now. now. Kill him here, right here. Blood is one move away. Kill him.'_

Dream's body twisted in an unnatural way, presumably to look at Techno.

"So, I have a problem."

"A problem?"

"Tommy-" his hands clapped together against the mask, then dropped pointing towards Techno, "well, Tommy left."

_'Deny everything.'_

"Who?"

_'Not everything everything, dumbass.'_

"Oh, Tommy- right right. He got exiled? That's funny." he mentally slapped himself.

Dream stopped himself from speaking, obviously judging Techno's reply.

"And of course you know that I can't let him leave exile, or let him in L'Manberg."

"Of course- that's literally what exile is."

"Anyways, I wanted to know if you've seen him."

The poorly drawn smiley face always was unsettling, it only made the cabin feel colder, danger could be felt coming from the tall unwanted guest.

"Haven't seen him around here, no."

Dream stepped closer to Techno, slightly tilting his head to the side. 

"You sure?"

"Certainly."

A tense moment passed before the taller backed off.

"Alright then, I guess I'll see you around. Tell me if you see him though, I don't want anything bad happening to Tommy."

"You have my word, allow me to let you out."

_'Kick him when he goes through the doorway.'_

"It's fine, I'll let myself out."

He paused once again, scanning the room before opening the door.

"Bye for now."

The door shut with a click, neither Techno or Tommy budged or spoke until they could no longer hear the crunch of snow underneath Dream's boots.

"Is...is he gone?" the teen whispered, afraid to move.

"I think so, I don't see or hear him anymore."

Tommy's potion wore off as he climbed out of the barrel, he was covered in sweat and pale.

Without saying anything, Tommy quickly hugged Techno tightly, shoving his face into his shoulders. Techno jumped lightly, not expecting something so affectionate.

"Thank you." a mumbled whisper of gratitude.

The duo stood there until Tommy pulled himself away, small tears of relief fell from his face.

"I wished I broke his arms, it was hard not to."

A small smile filled the boy's face, rubbing the water from his face.

"What about the no violence rule?"

"I think I can make an exception."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been dying to write Tommy saying piss off, you can't believe the happiness I had writing those 3 words.  
> Since I didn't feel like writing about messenger birds or something, I added some more world building. Mail teleports between the addressee and writer if it wasn't hand delivered. Also, I thought it would be nice if Nether plants were either sweet or spicy.  
> Shout out to the amazing reader that made me register a simple task: _italics_  
>  Words: 2926 (ooh finally something long)  
> Comment if you liked it, any positive critique is welcome :)


	5. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of snow and dialog.  
> TW- mentions dead animals, but it's hunting and food so,,

Fear lingered in the back of the duo's minds for the next few days, not knowing when anyone would show up unexpectedly kept them on edge. Techno insisted that Tommy kept a potion on him at all times, prepared for the worst. But besides that, things between the siblings relaxed into semi-normal behavior.

Tommy started acting a little more bolder, more like the child he was before.

"Ey Techno! Look what I got!"

Tommy waved his arm erratically, perched up on a set of snowy rocks. A rabbit laid limp on an arrow in his hand.

"Good shot, we can use that for dinner."

A week passed after Dream showed up, and since no one else was around, Techno allowed Tommy to come with him while hunting and grabbing supplies. It made the blonde's mood boost and gave both company.

The boy jumped off of the rocks, a loud crunch of snow indicating his landing.

"Mine's bigger than the one you hit."

"So?"

Tommy dropped the rabbit onto the sled dragging behind the two, laying it on top of the other catches they've collected.

"Means I'm better at hunting than you."

A small huff and chuckle was Techno's response, silently denying the teen's statement.

"I heard that dickhead!"

Tommy trailed behind the older majority of the time, tightly holding onto Techno's winter cape. The boy would never admit it, but he was extremely clingy to others.

The two stopped their hike so Techno could chop down a tree, he insisted that they had to make an actual room for the boy to sleep in.

_"There is no way you're going to live in a dark cold cave again."_

_"I can't steal your bed! Plus your chair is shit!" He waved his arms dramatically, trying to make his point bigger._

_"So? We'll just have to make a guest room."_

_"A guest room?"_

_"I mean yeah, a guest room. Since you're here, and Phil visits, might as well."_

_Techno was nervous of his offer, it has been years since he shared a home with someone._

_"...So I can really stay here?"_

_Tommy tugged on his sweater, too much time passed since he wasn't alone._

_"Not like you have a lot of other options."_

_Fair point, but the two knew that he didn't even have another option in the first place._

_"I can use the hole you made as the base, and I'll just expand it and make it livable. It'll probably take me a few days to finish, in the meantime you can keep using my room."_

_Fire crackled while the two sketched out possible floor plans (mostly Techno drew room designs, the one that Tommy came up with involved serval cobblestone rooms and tunnels connected and some kind of log girlfriend; and when his idea was discarded he gave up and doodled instead), failed ideas were crumbled and tossed to the side._

_"Techno?"_

_"Yeah?"_

_"Thank you."_

_He looked up from his papers to see Tommy falling asleep, his arms cradling his head against the wooden table._

_A small smile fixed Techno's face, the older ruffled the teen's hair lightly. Giving him a place to feel safe was the least he could do._

"Alright- let's head back."

"Aw man, really? It's not even dark yet!"

"Yeah but we can't carry anything else."

An angry huff was Tommy's only reaction, and he followed Techno down the trail they created. 

Snow started to dust the pile of wood and prey on the sled, flakes caught onto their hair. Silence filled the air, besides the quiet rustle of branches and the crunch of snow beneath their feet.

A minute passed before Tommy tried to instigate. With a loud bop, a snowball crumbled against Techno's frame.

"Eh?! Tommy what was that for?!"

Tommy busted out laughing, his infamous obnoxious laugh filled the air. In his arms were several more snowballs ready to be thrown.

Bop!

"Cut it out!!"

Bop!

"Why don't you make me, bitch!!"

Bop! Bop!

"That's it, I'm done playing nice guy!"

With a crunch of crudely formed snow coming apart, Techno knocked Tommy off balance using a snowball.

A full blown snowball fight ensued between the siblings, their ammo flying in every direction. Thuds and laughs rung throughout the woods, determination and cheer filled the arena. The two darted from and aimed at each other until the other gave up, their breaths danced in the winter air.

"T-Techno-" the blonde huffed, running from an incoming snowball, "I give up, I give up!"

"Finally- I'm exhausted."

They both chuckled lightly, still out of breath from running around.

"Alright, now we have to go back." 

"Ok ok, fine."

Techno walked to the forgotten sled, then waited for Tommy to catch up to his spot. With a small nudge and tug on his cape, the two continued their way home.

They returned to the cabin just in the nick of time, the light snowfall grew into a storm on their way back. The wood was dropped onto the floor, the floorboards once again moved out of the way.

The room was coming along well, all that was needed to do was creating a trapdoor entrance, filling it with furniture, and finishing a wall. The once cramped, freezing and dark hole was now a heated, well lit, livable room, roughly the size of Techno's room upstairs.

"Ey Techno, can I have a foot off of the rabbit I got today?"

"Why are you asking me?"

The teen wasn't used to having the ability to do what he wanted to anymore, so asking for permission was drilled in his head.

"...Is that a yes?"

"It's your rabbit."

He shot it, it was his rabbit. Something to keep for himself.

"Right right, it's _my_ rabbit." an audible smile.

This behavior was new for his brother, Techno didn't remember Tommy being that timid over having things for himself. Hell, the teen fought a war over discs he could replace. It was learned too, but Techno didn't want to pressure his sibling into telling how it happened, nothing good caused it in the first place.

Once Tommy chopped the foot off of the rabbit, the thing was skinned and seasoned for a roast. Cooking wasn't the strongest skill either had, but they knew enough to make decent dishes.

"You're going to burn it like that." Techno warned the teen who was currently hanging the rabbit too close to the flames of the fireplace.

"Am not."

"Are too, put it up higher."

"It's going to take forever to cook like that!"

Techno checked outside through the window, the storm returned to a gentle snowfall.

"We have time to spare."

A small grumble of defiance came from Tommy, he kept the rabbit in the spot he hung it at.

The soft sizzle of roast, well, roasting and the chopping of potatoes and carrots filled the cabin. The two simply existing in the same place was no longer tense, it was relaxed, warm. It almost felt like home.

The diced vegetables were dumped into a skillet and placed on the stove, giving Techno some free time to think.

He was planning on saving Phil from imprisonment, but it was too risky for him at the moment. He didn't have any of his weapons besides his pickaxe, and he knew that there wasn't a chance of him getting them peacefully. Techno also had to look out for Tommy, the voices kept saying that Dream could arrive at any moment.

"Are you deaf man?"

"Eh?" Techno didn't realize that he was lost in his thoughts until now.

"I said the rabbit's done."

"Alright, potatoes are almost finished, they'll be ready in a moment."

The two sat at the table, quietly chomping away at the meal they've made. The rabbit had some slightly charred pieces, barely enough to be called crispy.

"Told you that you'd burn it." Techno jokingly sneered, obviously pretending that he didn't enjoy what was served.

"A-Wha- shush you pig man!" Tommy defended, flicking a carrot at Techno's face.

"Gross!" the older wiped the vegetable off of his cheek, then took a sip of his water.

A silent beat passes before either says anything.

"Tommy," Techno poked at a potato with his fork, "now that you don't have anything stopping you, what's your plan now?"

"My...plan?"

"Yeah, what's next?"

"...I want to get my discs back."

He also wanted to go home, to sit on the bench with his best friend, but those goals seemed unrealistic to him.

"Your discs?"

"Yeah, _my_ discs- I want them back."

Gears turned in Techno's head, piecing together a plan of his own.

"After you're done eating, let's go somewhere."

The two didn't bother cleaning up before they went out the door, it wasn't like the mess was going anywhere. 

The dark sky was illuminated by a small crescent moon, sprinkles of stars, and the lantern brought with. 

"Where are we going?" Even with multiple layers, cold bit the duo's limbs.

"You'll see in a second, we're almost there."

Tommy was on edge, not knowing what he was walking to make his stomach turn. He kept a tight grip on the hilt of his sword (Techno gave him one before they left, uncase they came across monsters or worse: other people) and on his brother's cape. He would protect him, wouldn't he?

The dense trees lining the path around them seemed to get thicker with each step, slowly getting replaced with rocks, boulders, then cliff ledges. Techno stopped at a small clearing, completely surrounded by large mountain walls.

"And we're here."

Confusion filled the younger's face, the two were literally in the middle of nowhere.

"Where is here exactly? Y-you're not going to kill me, are you?" a nervous laugh, the question was only a partial joke.

Techno frowned once again.

"Tommy, I'm not going to kill you, I said that already."

"Right, right-" He shuffled in place awkwardly, "sorry."

Techno wandered over to a short ledge, brushing snow off of a now visible, stone button. He looked over to Tommy before tilting his head, indicating that he should come over. The blonde did as directed, stopping at in front of it.

"Go ahead," Techno waved his hand, "hit it."

He walked back to the middle of the clearing, waiting for the teen to press the device.

Tommy hated buttons, the reason was understandable enough. His breath quivered in the frosty air, and with a slightly shaky hand, he quickly pressed the button.

He darted back to Techno only to hear a low rumbling noise, and for Techno to step forward. One of the stone walls rose to reveal a vault of death.

High walls were decorated with dozens upon dozens of wither skulls, the room illuminated with blue fire. The glint of purple armor and swords lined the center. Techno twisted to face his brother, an enormous smile plastered his features.

"Welcome home Theseus!" A loud laugh and wide stretched arms inviting Tommy into the chamber.

Tommy's stomach dropped, and so did he. Sprawled out in the snow, his heart trying now to explode.

"AAA WHAT THE HELL! WHAT THE FUCK!!!"

Techno's laughed died to a chuckle, and he roamed over to the collapsed teen.

"We're going to get back what's ours, any means necessary."

"Nononono we can't upset Tubbo!"

Or risk killing him, or destroy L'Manberg. But those were unsaid, they seemed to go hand in hand with upsetting his friend.

"Well, uh, this isn't the main plan, more like...a last resort?" Techno itched the back of his neck, and stuck out his arm for the teen to grab.

"Wh-what's the main plan then?"

"We have to save Phil, get my weapons and your discs back, and if we have the time- revenge."

Tommy returned to his feet, and the two shuffled inside the chamber. The ashy scent of the bones and fire filled their lungs, along with the winter air.

"Revenge?"

"Yeah, they went too far. Exile, then an attempted execution, and now I have several more reasons to kill Dream."

Tommy's chest tightened, but continued to listen.

"...We're not going to blow up L'Manberg, are we?"

"There's a chance," Techno cleared his throat, "but if anything, we'll just cause minor acts of terrorism."

"Only minor?"

"Yeah."

If they weren't causing too much trouble, and they were doing this for their mutual benefits, why did it seem so wrong?

"...So we're just getting back what's ours?"

Was he worried that history was going to repeat itself?

"That's the plan."

Was the horrors of the festival going to happen again?

"To get your weapons,"

Was this what Wilbur felt like?

"and my discs..."

Nothing too bad would happen, would it?

"...Techno, p-promise me something."

"Of course."

"We'll do this, but we can't hurt Tubbo."

"I'll keep my word."

Techno stuck out his hand, indicating to do a handshake. Tommy took it with a determined but trembling hand. 

"Glad to have you as a business partner."

The brothers smiled, but both were nervous at the idea.

"We're partners in crime."

They walked into the cold wilderness, the rock door encasing the room of destruction behind them.

"Let's head home, we have a busy day tomorrow."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Snowball fights, literally an icebreaker X)  
> There's been an awful lot of angst in this and more to come, so have a fluffier chapter.  
> Also I haven't really described Techno's psychical appearance besides his eyes, but in this he's humanish. He's got canines, elf ears and a tail, but he's essentially a human. Anthros are hard to describe for me, sorry :p  
> Words: 2201  
> Comment if you liked it, positive critique is welcome :)


	6. Wooden Shards

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ouch, long one guys  
> TW//Suicidal Thoughts

_Knees deep in the ocean, waves rolling back and forth against his legs. The freezing water made his limbs numb, the taste of salt on his lips._

_"Nobody...nobody came."_

_Small colored paper lanterns and the blazing orange sunset lit the beach, untouched cake sat on a long wooden table._

_Back,_

_"I'm here Tommy."_

_and forth._

_"B-but...no one else is."_

_Back,_

_He wonders what being underneath the waves is like._

_and forth._

_Would it hurt?_

_Back,_

_"No one cares anymore...do they?"_

_and forth._

_"Well,"_

_Back,_

_Deep underneath. Would anyone miss him?_

_and forth._

_"they all received the invitations."_

_Back,_

_Would anyone care if he left?_

_and forth._

_"I guess they were all busy."_

_Back,_

_"Let's do the party anyways, just you and me."_

_and forth._

_Maybe he would be happier at the bottom of the ocean._

_Back,_

_"C'mon Tommy, let's have some cake."_

_and forth._

_His eyes burned. He was too tired to cry, too tired to be alive._

_Back,_

_A firm hand clapped his shoulder._

_and forth._

_"...Let's just go to Logsted instead."_

_Back,_

_He didn't say anything._

_and forth._

_He hated that beach anyways._

Tommy stirred to the quiet shuffle of footsteps above his head.

"Techno?" a whisper, not wanting to risk calling out for someone else.

No reply, but a soft ring of a bell piped his curiosity.

The teen rolled out of bed as smoothly as his body let him, pulling the handle of his sword with him. The loud beating of his heart was muted to the outside world, the panic seeping into his bloodstream.

A shaky hand brought his weight up the ladder, slightly cracking the trapdoor enough to see. His eyes were met with a hoof and blue wool.

"...Wilbur?"

"Oh! You are here! Hello!" The cheerful tone in the ghost's voice made a gentle echo.

Tommy opened the trapdoor completely, letting himself halfway out of the entrance.

Wilbur was floating around the table while a sheep stared down at the blonde. A golden ribbon and bell wrapped itself around the fluff of its neck, it was almost dyed fully blue.

"Hey, Wil, did Techno let your pal in?"

"I think so, he's Friend! Say hi Friend!" 

"Uh, hello." his quiet greeting was replied with a gentle baa.

Wilbur smiled, being nothing but happy in the moment.

"Look at that! He really likes you!" he clapped before petting the soft wool of his sheep.

"...I guess." he shrugged, doubting that the sheep even cared about anything but grass.

"Why are you here?"

"I came to visit! Also I brought gifts!" his smile never went away, didn't it?

He took a moment before handing Tommy a small leather book, a red ribbon wrapped around the bind, keeping it closed tightly.

"It's a journal for you to write in, draw, or whatever you want!"

"Thank you." he smiled, another thing just for him.

"I had something for Techno, but I just don't remember what..." He sighed in annoyance, disappointed that he forgot what he was planning to give.

The blonde giggled at his misfortune, only to be met with the squish of wool against his face.

"Oi Wilbur, your friend is awfully clingy."

The phantom chuckled before humming mindlessly.

"How's it like living out here with Techno? Isn't it too cold?"

"It's better than th- it's so nice."

It was nice, it was heavenly compared to Logstedshire. He was warm, had food, had actual walls. He had an actual bed, not a raggedy hammock. All things that were once deemed basic needs now were rare gifts, and for the first time in forever he had them all at the same time.

"I'm glad you like it! It's like old times isn't it?"

"What do you mean?"

"We're together as a family!"

It's been awhile since they've been together, wasn't it? Besides it ending with Wilbur's death and Techno destroying the nation, them being together wasn't that bad. They had some good times, sharing dinner between brothers and friends, lit by lanterns and taking place in tunnels. Training ending in light hearted swordplay, falling asleep in the armory.

It was the gentle moments in wars that bonded people, and yet the same ones that separated them in the end.

Tommy's hair ruffled, one of the only ways he could get physical affection from his brother now, only a transparent grey hand.

"I have to go back now, it's too cold for me to stay." his soft words were laced with a gentle sadness, but he kept a smile on his face.

"Oh, ok." he understood, it wasn't irregular for everyone to leave.

"See you later, say bye friend!"

Wilbur waved, gently guiding his blue sheep out the door.

"Bye."

\---

Once out of the view of their pursuers and safely tucked into a pocket of trees near the shore, the two gave each other a quick embrace.

"I'm so glad you're safe Phil."

"I'm happy to be out," the older chuckled, "I haven't been able to stretch out for weeks."

An exaggeration, but Techno knew that his father felt sick if he wasn't able to fly.

The charcoal wings arched out, feathers trembling, finally reuniting with the air.

_'Phil is safe! Phil is here! Hurry! Hurry! You have to get back home!' the voices chattered excitedly, making Techno sigh in content._

He checked his inventory to see what resources remained for their way back as Phil took a moment to himself. Two and a half potions left, but it should do the trick. Techno pulled out a winter coat and cape, handing it to his father.

"Here, it's goin' to be cold when we get there."

"Ah, thanks."

Phil clipped the cape over his frame, and was handed another potion.

"Alright, we have to go. They're still looking for us and I can't leave him waiting-" he cut himself off, not planning on saying that Tommy was probably wondering where he was.

"Who's waiting?"

"Oh um," he cleared his throat, "Tommy's at the cabin."

An awkward pause sat between them before Phil chuckled.

"So he left and ended up there? That's unexpected."

"Yeah yeah, but Phil- something happened to him, I can't figure out what though."

"What do you mean?"

"He's just...different. I have a feeling Dream was doing something to him."

_'He did, he did. What was it? He did he did.'_

Phil's light smile dropped, he noticed how Techno tensed at the mention.

"Oh."

_'Tommy needs us, let's go home. Home, home, let's go home.'_

"I know, I know, we're going now." he muttered under his breath, fixing his skull mask against his face.

Techno felt a gentle hand against one of his shoulders, warm feathers wrapped the other.

"At least he's with us."

The younger relaxed slightly, letting a sigh escape his lips, then refocused on what they were doing. After shuffling through his bag one last time, he raised his own bottle of sparkling blue to his face.

"Let's head out."

The duo let the throat burning potions take effect, the only things remaining visible was the armor encasing them.

Off into the winter tundra they went.

\---

He knew that he shouldn't go outside when Techno was gone, but for the smallest moment he felt brave.

With his fresh leather notebook in hand, he wanted to conquer his fears, prove to himself that he made it. That's what he told himself at least, his list was dangerous to him. The teen's thought process was 'I can't be a Big Man without confronting the things that scare me'.

He started with something easy to do physically, but the mental toll seemed to pile on with everything he tasked himself with. 

_1- Dig and bury a hole._

Removing the cold earth was easy, something he was used to. With a hole below him, he almost tried to drop his book in it.

No, that's not what the blonde was doing.

He pulled his arm back, his mouth becoming dry. Not being threatened or hearing a pop of lit dynamite wasn't what his body was preparing for.

The teen shoved all the dirt back into its original location, his shovel seemed heavier in his hands.

A scratchy line of ink crossed it out, one less thing to do.

_2- Burn something._

He frowned at his sloppy handwriting, disappointed in his own to do list. The blonde burned dozens of things, why did it matter now?

Was it because it had to be one of his own items, just like Dream would do?

He scribbled messily, blacking it out of the page. It wasn't worth wasting his time on.

_3- Yell super loud._

Something he could do, he was tired from being quiet, tired of being weak.

Tommy climbed onto a decent sized boulder, giving him a small platform that made him feel taller.

"BITCH!!" the meaningless profanity rang out in the winter air, giving him the smallest smile.

He felt big, he felt like himself for a flash of a second.

The teen dropped off of the rock with a slight bounce in his step, pulling his journal into his hands once again.

His cheeriful ink stroke ended in a sharp jolt, his senses becoming hyper aware of the surroundings.

A branch snapped behind him.

Tommy reached for his sword, only to be met with the empty side of his hip. He left it back at the cabin, along with his invisibility potion. He only had his book and a shovel, nothing that'll protect him from something that was big enough to make a branch break like that.

Why was he so careless?

He started running, he had no other options. He had to go back home. The snow crunched beneath him, tree branches and underbrush battered against his limbs.

Luckily he didn't have to go too far, the welcoming sight stood in the open air.

He essentially threw himself inside, slamming the spruce doors behind him. Cold fingers pried open the barrel, and into the container he went.

The ambient noise was replaced with his battered breathing, a loud knock on the door indicated a visitor.

"Techno open up." Dream demanded, only to be met with silence.

Seconds pass before another knock.

More silence, Tommy muffled his short breaths.

The door creaked open, followed by the metal rumble of something dragging across the floor. It sounded sharp.

The drag stopped a few feet away from the teen, then a sound of something dropping against wood.

Dream found the guest room, Tommy's room.

"...Tommy?"

Panic rose in his chest, his eyes tearing from the sound of Dream's voice.

"You're here right now, aren't you?"

The sound of his voice moved, the volume of it being the one thing giving his spot inside away.

"I saw you, in the woods. You know that you're not supposed to be here."

Being here was better for him, so much better. 

"You left Tommy! You're supposed to listen, to be back at the beach."

Why did he have to sound so condescending?

“Where are you hiding?"

He choked out a silent sob, Dream was less than a foot away from him. Only a crummy wooden lid stood between them.

He didn’t have any potions, he didn’t have any weapons, he didn’t have anything but the barrel he desperately trembled in.

Tommy could hear the thud of books being thrown against the floor.

“Tommy, I just want you to be safe.” The calm way he said it made it feel like the truth, but the teen painfully knew that it was a lie.

Chests and cabinets slammed open and closed, only the drag of an axe gave away Dream’s location in the cabin.

Tommy’s heart pounded, tears burned streaks down his face. He didn’t want to go back. He couldn’t go back. He was finally safe, he was finally in an actual home.  
A metal clink against the barrel indicated that the axe was discarded on the floor, a wooden thunk against the side of the barrel.

No.

A harsh kick almost cracked the wooden walls keeping him hidden.

No no.

The lid twisted, and was slightly raising up.

No no no.

“Dream, get the hell out of my son's home.”

The lid dropped against the barrel once again.

"Philza Minecraft, didn't expect you to be here." what a horrifyingly cheerful tone.

"I didn't expect you either."

Techno and Phil stood in the doorway, swords drawn, ready for a fight. 

"Dream, get out of my cabin right now or you'll be gutted."

"Quite the talk for a lying pig."

"I'm not the lyin-"

"Shut the fuck up, you lied about Tommy not being here."

Techno tensed, how did he know?

"You know that he's supposed to stay in exile, under _my_ watch, and you lied about him being here?" 

The same tone that the teen flinched at, that caused him to feel guilty for existing, that was used when his home was blown into oblivion. Tommy was barely able to keep himself from apologizing. He instead bit his palm harshly, blood dripping down his forearm and chin.

"So where is he?"

"He's not here."

"No, you fucking liar, where is he? I found his _hidden little room_ , I saw his stuff! Where the hell is Tommy?"

"Tommy isn't here, I suggest that you get the fuck out before you lose your legs."

"You can't kill me until you do your end of the deal, cut out the threats."

He froze, the teen couldn't breathe.

Techno had a deal? He owed Dream something? Was Tommy only a piece, a part of a favor? An item to be handed over on a silver plate?

The worst part is that Techno was a man of his word, someone that doesn't go back on a promise.

"You can't kill me until I cash in my favor, you dum-"

"-But I can, you fucking asshole. Get out of my sight before I shred you."

Dream paused for a moment before shoving past the two bladed men.

"I'll be back later, and next time-" he grinded his axe into Techno's chest, emphasizing his point, "I won't be leaving without Tommy."

The wooden door slammed into Dream's face, shutting him out of the now wrecked cabin. Techno fell onto his knees, he felt so damn powerless. 

"Tommy?" Phil whispered, trying to keep himself from flying out there and killing the green man in the snow.

A soft whimper was his response, but it was unheard by their father.

It wasn't unnoticed by Techno.

He got up from the ground and stumbled his way lightly to the half-kicked barrel, the voices screaming at him to do something. Anything to help. He dropped the hollow bone mask to the floor, then rested his forehead against the wall of the barrel.

Tommy felt a gentle knock on the wood behind his head.

"...Tommy?"

He flinched, his silent sobbing started to catch his voice. Harsh quiet breathing, whimpers of pure fear here and there.

"Are you hurt?"

Besides a now bruised bite in his hand, only mentally and emotionally. He could barely respond.

"D-De-Deal? Wh-what do you o-ow-owe him Techno?" he mustered enough strength to spit it out, choked on his own tears.

_'NOTHING, BREAK THE DEAL. NOTHING. NO NO NO.'_

"I-" He winced at his own pathetic tone and the inner shrills.

"Wha-at do you o-o-owe him T-echno."

Deals can and will be broken.

"...Nothin'. I don't owe him shit."

"B-be hon-nest."

"I am- I don't owe him anything."

"You don't owe him anything anymore, besides the pleasure of being beheaded." Phil cut in, his sword being angrily latched into its sheath.

Their father stepped forward, placing his hand gently on the damaged wood.

"Tomathy, are you hurt?"

"...No..."

"...Do you want to come out? He's gone, we're here."

"N-no."

The teen didn't want to leave the barrel, he didn't want to face his father, his brother, or the mess of the cabin. He didn't want anyone to see him either, not like the broken boy he felt like. 

Tommy breathing returned to the unstable state it was in, tears audibly rolling down his face. Techno brokenly stared at the floor, the throbbing of screaming filling his senses, denied the ability to think. Phil only hung his head to face the window, watching outside for other possible threats. 

Home was supposed to be warm, but it felt the complete opposite.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enter Dadza!  
> The fic isn't going to follow canon as much anymore, I'm kinda upset about how poor of a dad Phil canonically is and Tommy's and Techno's bond being gone.  
> Also my upload schedule is going to be funky now, my school started back again.  
> Words: 2732  
> Comment if you liked it, positive critique is welcome :)


	7. Birthday Wishes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When your plans don't go the way you want them to.
> 
> TW//  
> Panic attacks, mentions of suicide, general bad vibes
> 
> take care and drink some water loves

It took constant prying from the young president for Sapnap to finally crack, the man seemed hesitant to give him the directions to Tommy's exile.

He would've used his compass, but the poor teen was too swarmed with work to take a break and fix it- if he could even fix it in the first place. 

Tubbo essentially begged him to let him know, promising that he'll only go once (Dream denied everyone the location and permission to visit), asking to see him for his seventeenth birthday.

But when he finally did hand over the coordinates, all troubles seemed to melt off his shoulders.

He was finally going to see his friend, share his birthday with the most important person to him.

Sure, the nervous feeling in his gut refused to leave and asked the mental questions of _'why didn't he respond to the dozens of letters I wrote him?'_ and _'will he even want to see me?'_ , but he pushed them away; the pure joy that he hadn't experienced in so long kept a bounce in his step.

After telling Quackity to watch over everything for the day, the little ram went off and prepared a small picnic for the two of them. Hell, he even baked a honey birthday cake himself. It was perfect.

Slipping through the nether portal, he skipped lightly towards the next destination. The burning heat of the surroundings didn't bother him one bit, it was the only thing that made him remember that it wasn't a dream.

After wandering off of the main path and following an almost invisible pathway, the brunette finally found the secluded portal to his friend's location. He was slightly confused on why it was hidden in the first place, but he shook it off- it wasn't important.

Was it?

The sudden change from the scalding temperature to a cold wet one sent shivers down his spine, he didn't expect it to be raining.

Stepping out of the obsidian structure, the positivity that Tubbo held onto fell out of his grasp. It was too quiet for a place that Tommy was in.

"Hello?" he called out, only hearing the sound of rain in response.

As the hybrid crept farther down the path, faint gunpowder filled his sense of smell.

Tommy hates that smell, why did it smell like that?

Thunder rumbled above his head as he moved forward, the sky darkened with every step.

Why was it so quiet?

"Tommy?"

Where was he?

A flash of lighting illuminated a crumbly, enormous tower, causing him to gasp as his heart dropped.

Oh god. 

Destroyed cake layed forgotten on the ground, the empty crater in front of his feet adding to his fear.

"Surely not."

He didn't, did he?

"S-Surely not."

This was just him building towers, creepers destroying his builds?

Right?

"He didn't, he wouldn't-"

Would he? He was alone, not even he visited.

"Oh god, nonono-"

Did he truly kill himself? Waste his last life?

"To-Tom-"

He didn't, he didn't, he didn't-

"TOMMMYYYY!!" his throat burned, salty tears flooding.

He couldn't do anything but scream and cry for his best friend, for his other half, for his Tommy.

The same Tommy that killed himself, that he'll never see again.

Rain pounded against his frame, sobs racking his chest.

"TOM-" the mud beneath his feet gave out, sending him tumbling into the hole that once was a home, darkness filling his vision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shorter, but more to come.  
> Holy shit thanks for the 7k+ hits!! I love you guys/gals/nonbinary pals!!  
> Sorry for disappearing for a while, I lost motivation and school was a turd.  
> Why was Tubbo prying Sapnap for the location? Ghostbur is too much of a loveable airhead and he's the only other person that knows the location besides Dream.  
> Edit: added a few lines I missed last night  
> Words: 571  
> Comment if you liked it, positive critique is welcome :)


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